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The Story of Confounded: Embracing Moments of Confusion

Writer's picture: TFHTFH

The Emotions Library project is a collection of stories about the emotion(s) we experience. Stories bring meaning and clarity, helping us understand our emotions better. We do this so everyone can access knowledge, gain emotional literacy, and develop self-awareness.


Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times
Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times

Life often surprises us, sometimes delightfully, other times perplexingly. The feeling of being confounded — that disorienting confusion when the unexpected disrupts our understanding—can feel overwhelming. Yet, it offers a silver lining: a chance for growth, creativity, and problem-solving.


Being confounded reminds us of life’s unpredictability and challenges us to pause, reflect, and adapt. By cultivating emotional literacy—naming and validating our emotions—we can approach confusion with patience, clarity, and curiosity. These moments teach humility, foster resilience, and encourage creative thinking, transforming bewilderment into an opportunity for self-discovery and growth.


Story: Feeling confused or bewildered by something unexpected.


Impulse: Pause to reassess or seek clarity.


Etymology: From Latin confundere, meaning to pour together or confuse.


Purpose: Encourages problem-solving and new ways of thinking.


Emotional Regulation and Journaling


In partnership with Calm3D, we provide a safe space for self-regulation, to feel peace, safety and security. At the same time, reflect on your own emotional experience and experience your confounded story. 


Visit www.playcalm3d.com as you reflect and experience peace as you contemplate the emotions within you.


Reflective Questions


1. What part of this situation is most confusing to you?


2. How can you approach it with patience?


3. What resources or support might help you make sense of this?




Feeling Confused or Bewildered by Something Unexpected


It arrived on a Tuesday morning, just as Evelyn was settling into her second cup of coffee. A plain cardboard box, with no return address and only her name scrawled across the top in uneven black ink. She frowned, tilting her head as if the box might explain itself. It didn’t.


Evelyn wasn’t expecting a package. She wasn’t the kind of person who shopped online or received surprise gifts. She lived alone, kept to herself, and had a small, predictable circle of acquaintances. Yet here it was—a box that didn’t belong, demanding her attention.


Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times
Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times

Her first instinct was curiosity. She ran her fingers over the tape, tempted to peel it back. But something about the anonymity of the package made her hesitate. What if it was a mistake? What if it wasn’t meant for her? Or worse—what if it was?


This was the essence of being confounded. It felt like standing at an unexpected fork in the road, the familiar path suddenly obscured. Confusion wrapped around her like a fog, urging her to pause and reassess.


The Impulse to Pause and Reassess


Our instinct when faced with confusion is often to react immediately, scrambling for answers. Yet Evelyn resisted. Instead, she leaned into the pause, allowing space for reflection.


She made a list. Writing things down always helped her think clearly:

  1. Is it safe? No strange odors, no odd sounds. Probably safe.

  2. Could it be for someone else? Unlikely. Her name was on it.

  3. What’s the worst it could be? The possibilities ranged from mundane (a misdelivery) to absurd (a prank).

  4. What’s the best it could be? A gift. A surprise. Something good.


By taking this step back, Evelyn created space for calm consideration. The fog of confusion began to shift.


Opening the Box


Finally, Evelyn sliced through the tape and lifted the flaps. Inside was a neatly folded piece of paper sitting atop a bundle wrapped in tissue.


She picked up the paper first, her hands trembling slightly. It read:

"Evelyn, you may not remember me, but I owe you everything. Thank you for showing kindness when I needed it most. I hope this brings you as much joy as your kindness brought me.—An Old Friend"


An old friend? Evelyn’s mind raced. She had no idea who the sender might be. She tried to think back—had she helped someone recently? Or was this from long ago?


Setting the note aside, she carefully unwrapped the tissue. Inside was a small, beautifully carved wooden bird. Its wings were outstretched, as if caught mid-flight, and its intricate details suggested hours of painstaking work. It was stunning.


The Origins of ‘Confounded’


Imagine this: you’re following a well-trodden path, confident in the next steps, when suddenly, you hit an unexpected fork. The roadmap you relied on seems obsolete. This is the essence of being confounded—a feeling of bewilderment triggered by something unforeseen. It can feel uncomfortable, like standing in the eye of a storm of uncertainty. Yet, it is precisely this disorientation that signals a chance to step back, reevaluate, and discover new perspectives.


The term confounded has its roots in the Latin word confundere, meaning "to pour together or confuse." The imagery is apt—confusion often feels like thoughts or possibilities swirling together in a chaotic mix. But with time, clarity emerges, much like separating oil from water.



The Purpose: Growth Through Problem-Solving


Evelyn’s confusion remained, but it had taken on a new shape—one filled with warmth and curiosity. Being confounded had challenged her to pause, reflect, and approach the situation with patience.


Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times
Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times

The wooden bird was more than a gift; it was a reminder that her kindness had mattered. She realized that even if she didn’t fully understand the story behind the gesture, it didn’t diminish its significance.


Confusion had become a doorway to reflection and gratitude. As she placed the bird on her windowsill, she thought about the lessons embedded in the experience:


  • Confusion isn’t inherently bad—it’s a chance to reassess and explore.

  • Patience and emotional literacy can transform uncertainty into opportunity.

  • Moments of kindness ripple outward in ways we may never see.


Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times


In moments of being confounded, emotional literacy can be an invaluable tool. As Evelyn stared at the box, she named what she was feeling:


  • Frustration: “I wish I knew who sent this and why.”

  • Curiosity: “What could be inside?”

  • Apprehension: “What if it’s something unpleasant?”


Naming her emotions helped reduce their intensity, grounding her in the reality of the moment. Instead of reacting impulsively, she validated her experience: “It’s okay to feel uncertain. This is a strange situation.”


Emotional literacy empowered Evelyn to separate her emotions from her actions. She chose patience over haste, deciding to approach the situation thoughtfully.



Reflective Questions


When confusion strikes, consider these three reflective questions to guide your next steps:


Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times
Emotional Literacy: Building a Foundation for Clarity in Confounding Times

  1. What part of this situation is most confusing to you?

    Identifying the root of your confusion helps break it into manageable parts. Are you unsure of someone’s intentions? Do you lack key information? Is your emotional reaction clouding your judgment?

  2. How can you approach it with patience?

    Patience doesn’t mean inaction. It’s about allowing the time needed to explore possibilities, seek clarity, and calmly work toward solutions. What small steps can you take to address the situation without rushing?

  3. What resources or support might help you make sense of this?

    Whether it’s seeking advice from a trusted friend, consulting an expert, or turning to research, leveraging resources empowers you to move forward with confidence. Who or what might offer guidance right now?



Finding Strength in the Swirl


Evelyn’s experience with the mysterious box reflects the broader theme of being confounded: encountering the unexpected and discovering opportunities within it. While these moments may feel unsettling, they are also invitations to reassess, grow, and innovate.

By embracing the pause, building emotional literacy, and remaining patient, you can turn moments of confusion into stepping stones for deeper understanding and success.


The next time you find yourself confounded, take a breath and lean into the swirl. Who knows? You may emerge with not only a clearer path but also newfound wisdom to navigate the twists and turns of life.




Final Thoughts


If Evelyn’s journey of feeling confounded and finding clarity through the mysterious box resonates with you, consider enhancing your emotional literacy to better navigate and make sense of such bewildering moments. Tools like Emoli Cards can help you identify and articulate the emotions behind these experiences, empowering you to approach confusion with greater patience and intention. By understanding your feelings more deeply, you can transform moments of being confounded into opportunities for growth, resilience, and self-discovery, much like Evelyn did through her thoughtful, reflective process.


For personalized support, book an Emotions-Based Coaching session. Together, we’ll explore how embracing and understanding the feeling of being confounded can deepen your self-awareness, foster creative problem-solving, and nurture your emotional well-being—all while honouring your unique journey and values.

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